What happened to last Thursday's word?

Every Thursday I learn a new word from my student, and I try to post that word out there on the Itty Bitty cyber frontier ASAP so that we can all become more erudite (not to be confused with crudites*). No need for me to hog all the erudition for myself! You know how it goes straight to my thighs anyway... sorta like a chocolate cake donut with white frosting and sprinkles. More about that donut later.

Now, I appreciate your mounting sentiment that it is cruel to leave you hanging on this barbed hook, justa wigglin' and waitin' for the Thursday word, with baited breath, even! Last Thursday's word was approcreate.

Since I subscribe to the highest standards of bloggership, I must hold each Thursday's word of insight up to the bifocal lens of Visine scholarly research. Which means, basically, I Google to see if the word might have been previously discovered, check the Online Etymology Dictionary, and page through my favorite old American Heritage Dictionary. I don't look it up in my Funk and Wagnalls**, since I don't have one. Alas, this time the Thursday word had several Google hits. What if "approcreate" is some sort of asexual function of Martian sea slugs? Scouring the Web for illumination I find that "approcreate" is an adjective used primarily by homophobic teens, Audi owners, physics nerds with Tesla tuners, and secretaries of student government organizations.

"Is that approcreate behavior?" The kids are singing the Queen song that goes, "We will, we will, rock you!" They are replacing "rock" with every rhyming word and variation that exists, and you know what I mean. Sensing a small dose of radiated teacherly disapproval they mimic a teacherly tone to ask each other if their behavior is approcreate.

Reminds me of an apocryphal family story about a spelling bee in a one-room country school. "Spell fish," the teacher says. "Fish, B O X," replies the spelling student.

Besides all this vocabulary instruction, I have a helpful hint for you free of charge. If you ever have to calm a preschooler who has been injured, I suggest you calmly introduce the subject of donuts. Preschoolers have very firm opinions about donuts, and they are always glad to tell you those opinions even while they are having a scary major nosebleed. As they express their opinions, their mental image of The Perfect Donut overcomes their fear. Of course just discussing donuts for the time required to stop a nosebleed may make a grownup gain five pounds.

*crudites (kroo-dit-ta) pl.n. Cut raw vegetables, such as carrot sticks and pepper strips, served often with a dip as an appetizer. [French, pl. of crudite, rawness, from Old French crudite, from Latin cru-di-tas, indigestion, undigested food, from crud-us, raw; see crude.] The American Heritage® Dictionary of the English Language, Fourth Edition copyright ©2000 by Houghton Mifflin Company. Updated in 2003. Published by Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved. See also Rabbit food

**One of the catch phrases on the late '60s American television show Rowan & Martin's Laugh-In was: "Look that up in your Funk and Wagnalls". My Thursday students would fit right in with Goldie Hawn, Arte Johnson, Ruth Buzzi, JoAnne Worley, Judy Carne, Lily Tomlin, Henry Gibson, Flip Wilson, and Gary Owens.

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